If there is one thing that people are afraid of more than anything else, it is the fear of failing. No one likes a failure, it’s too much, you’re letting people down. Just some of the things that you might hear. Failure is not my fear. My biggest fear is not learning from my failures. Everyone fails at something at some point in their lives. From that failure, it is how you handle things and learn from it. It sounds cliche, but it is like the old saying, “fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.” If you’re not learning from your failures, you truly are failing yourself. There are times in our lives that we might hit rock bottom. Whether that being from the sense of failure, bad luck, etc. However you end up at rock bottom, it’s up to you to get out of it. You can either sit there, mope, and sulk in the darkness OR you can sit there, evaluate, and walk towards the light. It won’t always be easy to find your way to the light, but ultimately it will make you stronger. Rarely would I say, “I challenge you to fail at something,” but if you are confused or lost, I say, “do it.” Failing and having the sense of being rock bottom allows you to rediscover yourself. You think, “how the hell did I end up here…” Sometimes you need that. It’s like a reboot. In order to get out of the funk, you have to dig DEEP within yourself and find what makes you happy. Only at that point will you figure out how to leave the darkness behind. Everything that you do from that point, whether it be meeting new people, starting a community, starting a new hobby; you’re creating a step on a ladder. That ladder eventually leading to the light. Each step forming a new learning curve to your new being. Will relapse happen? I’d be lying if I said, no, you’ll never relapse. That’s part of how we cope. A human mechanism that we have if you will. When that presents itself, you have one of two options; let it happen and start all over from that dark pit you just got out of OR look past it and keep moving forward. The obvious choice is the latter. That is where you want to be. That says, “I’ve learned to deal with whatever happened and accept all consequences of any actions that I had taken.” What just happened? You grew, matured, blossomed. You won’t always get it the first time, but that’s why there is trial and error. Because honestly, at the end of the day, it’s all on you. You can ask for help and seek help, but you don’t want to use that as a crutch. Something to just hold you up while you try to figure things out. If you work on yourself with just you, that’s when the most growing occurs. You’re dealing with RAW emotions and only have your personal demons to battle with. If you can overcome THAT, you can overcome anything. The hardest battle you have will always be with yourself. You are your own critic, and you criticize yourself harder than anyone else. So this is where I challenge you. Fail. Take risks and fail. If you fail at something that you absolutely hate doing, then don’t do it. That’s part of the learning and trial and error process. If you fail at something that you absolutely love, then learn from it, come back, and do it even better. If it’s worth fighting for, you’ll find a way to overcome any failing in life. Keep doing that and you’ll learn that the real fear isn’t failure, but not learning from failing itself.
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